A Eulogy for the Ever-Failing

Massenet photographed by Pierre Petit, 1880

As a self-described “failure” (in a crazy-mixed-up-world) I wear my “failure-hood” as a badge of honor. I am a writer who delves into what goes on in the dodgy world of domestic (and geo-)politics, only to get a bit bored by it all. My tendency is to break through the normative, the conventional (to transcend what I have often referred to as “consensual reality and culture trance”). But in doing so—when I “go there”—I find that I may lose the interest of managing editors who sometimes publish my work. It may be too ethereal or beyond the “news-junky-mark” for them. Such is the life of a failure; this is the blues.

If and when this phenomenon comes around yet again, I just jump into my rattle-trap and continue on down the road, blazing forth, going my own way (or going down in a blaze of inglorious anonymity). I don’t care.

A more established American writer I used to like once said, “The concept of an independent scholar in America is a null set.” He was exiled to the dreaded “fringe” (even though, surprisingly, he turned out to be more of a lefty than I had at first thought.) Despite the hopeless sound of the sentiment he expressed, it is not far off the mark.

If you write, you write. There’s no accounting for editorial whimsy or public taste; when you are drawn to the writing life you go on in the face of many obstacles, as in “writing chose me, and not the other way around.” So on we go…

It’s a lonely craft when even family members and friends are ambivalent about (or even hostile to) your written work product. In fact, being a writer can be akin to being a prophet—about whom Jesus said, “Verily I say unto you, No prophet is accepted in his own country.” (Luke 2:24) Well, divinely inspired or not I ramble on, writing merrily away.

Still, stop for a moment and consider Élégie, Op. 10, by Jules Massenet, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ezwvgug9neo

Then consider the generic “eulogy,” not to be confused with “elegy.” (But aren’t they essentially the same thing? Yes, I think so.) We’re in the domain of the blues here. I’m playing this elegy and writing this eulogy to honor my inner failure as a writer.

I find that I am drawn more and more into the soulful realm of spirit, of spirituality—the invisible world—yet an invisible world made beautifully visible in nature’s pure aura, in the haunting melody as heard in Massenet’s Élégie, or in a simple, babbling brook, for that matter. To intuit something greater and grander than yourself is to be on the verge of the spirit world. Is it OK to go there from the mundane world of politics? I say, “Why not?” (After all, Archbishop Viganò thinks so. See, https://theduran.com/roman-catholic-bishop-pens-honest-letter-to-president-trump/)

All manifest things-actions-events-people, have a spiritual essence, do they not? So is it then permissible, even logical and expected, to be circumspect by bringing in the spiritual dimension to chosen topics under discussion? I certainly do think so.

And so I will go on my miserable-merry way, expounding as I go and as I wish. And may the Holy Spirit guide me along that way, infusing what few readers I may have with an apprehending grace and appreciation. Am I not forthright in my stance? Yes! And I am a content and proud, ever-failing failure!