Fact-Finding

Once there was a man with his head up his ass. He was discovered one morning in the village square. Nobody could figure out what was going on with him, though many offered explanations. 

First, a follower of an Indian guru said, "Ah, when love enters the head, reason goes out the ass!" -- but the others standing around agreed that this esoteric response didn't explain how the man's head went INTO his ass. 

 Next, a student of comparative mythology chimed in, saying, "It is clear that this man represents the ouroboros, the mythical snake eating it's own tail. His state symbolizes self-reflexivity or cyclicality, especially in the sense of something constantly re-creating itself, the eternal return, as it were." -- but the others standing around scoffed at this, saying that such a cerebral description still didn't explain what had happened to this man. 

Next a scientist spoke up, "We can conclude from the empirical evidence that this man is dead because in this condition he cannot breath and he has asphyxiated himself. He should be buried." -- the others scratched their heads, saying that maybe they should bury him, but not before they figured out how he came to be in this condition. 

Finally a bluesman came forward, saying, "This sucka's been hoodooed!" And putting one foot on his backside and grabbing both shoulders, he pulled hard and the man's head popped out of his ass. 

Then, to the amazement of the crowd, the man whose head had been up his ass opened his eyes, looked at the bluesman and said, "ARE YOU MY MOMMY?", at which point the bluesman pulled out his 44 and shot that mother dead, saying, "Some things is best left unanswered." 

And the crowd turned on the bluesman, strung him up for murder, and hung his ass on the limb of the nearest tree...

"Maybe this IS where Duffy got those goldfish. Hmmm..."